Saturday, April 24, 2010

Done for Now

I went on my second birth as a doula last night. It didn't work out as well as I hoped. I got the call at 10:30 in the morning, but I couldn't leave work because three of the other managers were out. I was doula-sharing, so the other doula headed to the hospital without me, and I called my back-up. Unfortunately she was in an induction and couldn't attend my birth. By the time I got there around 5:30, the mom was almost ready to push. I felt bad about leaving the other doula hanging and not being able to fulfill my commitment to the mom. The experience helped to reinforce a decision I'd already made. Doula-ing just doesn't work in my life right now. Even though my employer is flexible about it, I can't always just up and leave. I'm also not dealing well with the possibility of having to be awakened at any moment in at least a three week window around a due date. I want less stress in my life right now, not more. So I won't be taking on any new clients. Maybe someday my life will be better suited to being a doula and I can take it up again. Because I like doing it. And I think I am good at it.


Mary Stebbins Taitt said...

That's sad but understandable. I hope you do get to do it again if you like it. Life takes many unexpected turns.

I was twice offered a job as director of a nature center where I would have liked to have worked, but it turns out, sad as I was to turn it down, I'm better off and happier where I am--I think.

(Occasionally can't help but wonder).

Smellyann said...

Aw, I'm sorry to hear that, as I know how much you liked doing it.

As for the pink motorcycle helmet, I had to giggle. I just can't see it on you. But I'd like to! ;)